Wild Wild Kingdom - Tonight's Feature -The Teenager
Posted: Wednesday, August 06, 2008
by Roschelle Nelson
Are you having trouble figuring out how to deal with your teenager this summer? Teenagers are a difficult breed to understand and manage. They have many customs and rituals only associated with their species. These are past experiences I've had with my teenager. Hopefully, this will shed some insight on how to handle yours.
Life is a constant ebb and flow of emotions for teenagers. As the last day of school approaches, they jump and bounce with endless stockpiles of energy. They burst through the doors of their school building beaming with joy and bubbling over with anticipation of what adventures summer vacation will bring. School is officially over and they don't have to march to anyone's music for three solid months but their own. Or so they think.
They occasionally emerge from the dark cavernous confines of their room to forage for food, bathe (only when absolutely necessary or when threats of bodily harm finally register in their sweet little heads).
As the young teenager begins to adjust to his new schedule, much time is spent planning activities with the other members of his pack. They plan all sorts of fun activities - sitting around playing video games for hours on end, casual strolls around the neighborhood - not really going anywhere in particular - just walking.... and the beloved afternoon refrigerator raids.
With all the strenous activities I previously mentioned, the busy little tike's appetite can become quite enormous.
The teenager's skill of multi-tasking is refined during the summer months as well. Not only can these peculiar creatures hap-hazardly complete chores the den mother has left for them to do but they are able to watch every reality show, every music video, play and beat all video games, eat, dress and take care of other necessary bodily functions all while text messaging four to five members of the pack. Amazingly, all these duties are performed simultaneously!
Vacation planning for the entire family by the den mother and den father can be a difficult venture. Often enlisting the help of the neighborhood soothsayer can keep everyone's schedules conflict free.
The teenager tolerates the family vacation without any serious problems. Although verbal communication is generally at a minimum, he smiles and nods to communicate how thrilled he is to be accompanying den mother and den father on the annual family trip to see den grandmother!
However, getting back home is always top priority for the teenager since his pack (according to him) cannot function efficiently without him.
Things get back to normal once the teenager is back home. His sleep cycle resumes as scheduled along with the other pack-related activities.
Den mother, although she usually hates to admit it, enjoys watching her teenager grow and develop new skills during the summer months.
As the beginning of the return to school approaches, she is especially amazed at how much the teenager has grown over the past few months. She is permitted to shop with the teenager and his pack for new school items if she adheres to the pack cardinal shopping rule. At no time must den mother be within twenty feet of pack.
With proper planning and a certain amount of independence the teenager can have a great summer vacation. Even with all the strenous activities, pack meetings, and sleep comas, the teenager is usually just as excited about returning to school as he was about starting summer break.
In keeping with pack tradition, the teenager cannot show too much emotion while in the company of other members of the pack. But on occasion the teenager will slip into your mother/father den cave at night, crawl in bed beside you and plant a tender kiss on your cheek.
It is during these infrequent moments of tenderness that the teenager tells the den mother and father that he loves and appreciates them. Then the teenager retires to his cave down the hall anxiously anticipating the "Congregation of the Pack" for the first day of school.
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Top-level comments on this article: (3 total)Hi Roschelle, how funny, creative and true!! Thanks for sharing and reminding all of us that we are not alone in this thing :-)What a light-hearted article that made me smile. God bless!Please log in to respond to this comment.I'm glad you enjoyed it Teresa. Thanks for commentingRoschellePlease log in to respond to this comment.
I hear you loud and clear Roschelle! My youngest reminds me everyday about how the "pack" needs him. Thanks for the laugh. God bless you always.Please log in to respond to this comment.glad you enjoyed it Michelle. Be blessed!roschellePlease log in to respond to this comment.
hi roschelle,so now i know where my kids moved!i can totally relate. you relayed this article in a moving and funny,interesting and honest way. what more could one want?congrats for being article highlight.my best,suePlease log in to respond to this comment.thanks sue, I'm glad you enjoyed. Hopefully, this weekend I'll be able to catch up on some of your articles. I see you've been very busy *(smile)*RoschellePlease log in to respond to this comment.
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